Anger
"Let us not be too quick to assume our anger is sinful."
Quote by Dane Ortlund
In my Christian walk I had this belief that I should never express anger. I invited a woman from church over to my home for brunch. Shortly after receiving a text from her saying she was on her way, the doorbell rang. I opened the door and to my surprise I was greeted by unexpected guests. Two apartment complex maintenance men were standing on my porch. I was pretty confused because I was expecting the woman from church at my door. They told me that they received a maintenance ticket and were there to fix our flooring. However, neither my husband nor I requested it.They insisted we did. One of the men showed me a screen-shot of a hand written note with our house number. I told the two men we didn’t order maintenance, apologized for the inconvenience, and ended the conversation. I closed the door and called the main office to see how the misunderstanding came about. When I called, the main office refused to believe me that we never placed a maintenance order and tried to convince me that I had. After a couple exchanges going back and forth, placed on hold and finally talking to someone, the office realized it was a miscommunication on their end. As they were apologizing to me, the woman that was coming to my home for brunch walked up to my doorstep. Now, at the time, I was anxious, angry, sad, and confused. I had to quickly calm my spirit. I felt disheartened and afraid because of the anger rising inside me. I checked our doorbell camera and I was shocked at what I saw. My face appeared calmer than I imagined in my head. Seeing myself in the doorbell camera, I realized that I was placing a lot of shame on the emotions, especially my anger.
There is a quote from the book Gentle and Lowly where it says beautifully, “Emotions are an essential part of being human. Our emotions are diseased by the fall, of course, just as every part of fallen humanity is affected by the fall. But emotions are not themselves a result of the fall.”
Anger is a state of high emotion, resulting from one’s sense of morality - particularly, feeling intensely that something is wrong and should not be the way it is.
We have a great example in the Bible who expressed the emotion of anger – Jesus who was both human and divine. A famous depiction of Jesus getting angry is the example of Lazarus' death in John 11:33-38. Jesus was able to approach Lazarus' body in deep grief and disciplined anger. As a reader we are able to see the heart of Jesus who saves us from oppression and that he comes alongside us in our oppression.
It's profoundly permissible to express anger when the occasion is appropriate. (Psalm 4:4; Ephesians 4:26) I love how Dane Ortlund states it in the book, “a compassion-less Christ could never have gotten angry at the injustices all around him, the severity and human barbarity, even that flowing from the religious elite. No, compassion and indignation rise together in His soul. It is the father who loves his daughter most whose anger rises most fiercely if she is mistreated.” (pg 109)
What if we, as Christians, look through a different lens of how we see the emotion of anger?
Princeton theologian B. B. Warfield writes in essay On the Emotional Life of Our Lord:
“It would be impossible, therefore, for a moral being to stand in the presence of perceived wrong, indifferent and unmoved precisely what we mean by a moral being is a being perceptive of the difference between right and wrong and reacting appropriately to right and wrong perceived as such. The emotions of indignation and anger belong therefore to the very self-expression of a moral being as such and cannot be lacking to him in the presence of wrong.” (pg 108)
Bible Verse
“For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are— yet he did not sin.”
Hebrews 4:15
Additional scripture to reflect on:
Hebrews 2:17
Isaiah 53:4
John 11:33
Acts 10:38
Matthew 20:30-34
Mark 1:40-41
Luke 7:12-13
Reflections
In your walk as a Christian have you ever felt shame from the emotion of anger? Or has someone in your life shamed you because you expressed the emotion of anger?
When you experience anger, what is the main source the emotion is coming from? Is it out of grief (loss), distress (emotional suffering), or the belief of injustice (interpretation of fairness), or humiliation (pride)?
How can anger be redirected into something healthy or constructive? (example: talking it out, sports/hobbies, developing healthy self-talk, building up self esteem, choosing forgiveness, relaxation techniques, slowing down reactions, and notice when you start to ruminate on dissatisfaction thoughts).
